Post Break-up #2 To Do

Transition.

Here are the steps commonly involved in such a task:

Forced Calm.  It's not personal; it's business.
Incredulousness.  It's impossible that that really happened.
Peace.  This is where your love for the other person only lets you want the best for them. "If you love something, set it free..."
Perturbedness. This is where your memory kicks in.  "What the hell?!"
Melacholy.  Shoulda Woulda Coulda.
Jealousy.  It's best to let this one starve.  We always have a choice.
Acceptance.  Fine then!  Fine, ok, ok.  Fine.  I'm fine.  It's fine.  It's good.
Apathy.  "Weird that a while ago I had a serious boyfriend."

These steps may look orderly, but they're not.  Instead of consecutive keys on a piano; they're a song.  This is why you can't make a To Do list to get over someone, you have to just let yourself wake up to a melody in your head for a while. 
The steps aren't patient either.  They push and shove until they've each had enough of the spotlight.  Right when you feel like you're over it, you see an online post about a certain someone not sleeping because he's being kept up by a new girl.  Gag. 

My transition was a little awkward, because the break-up was sudden and unexpected for everyone else around me.  I had quite a few conversations similar to,

"Heather, Happy Holidays!  How are you and the boy?" 
"Holidays are going well!  Oh, we broke up!"
"Congratu...What??"
"We're not together anymore.  It's OK."
Silence.
"Oh."
I know the other probably wanted to end the conversation with "Merry Christmas!", but wasn't sure whether it's socially appropriate to wish a newly single person such a sentiment.

It is, so you know for the future.  Some break-ups might even bring merrier Christmases.

I am relieved to now be on the side of acceptance.  You know you're at this point when your mind is occupied with things other than all that stuff above, when you don't feel strongly in any direction about the person, and when you finally have a tinge of excitement for your new Friday night date. 

Sometimes I miss him when I am standing at my kitchen counter cutting up vegetables.  I would often get the daily message or call from him while right there doing just that.  I miss how I felt when I was with him and good he was at solving problems.  But, I no longer have burning questions to ask him or poignant observations to declare. As the Parable of the Cute Shirt (previous post) teaches, just because we like something doesn't mean we need it.  And, experience tells all of us, there is always something new around the corner. 

I must admit, I love the anticipation of what's around the corner.